Week 16 Quick Picks: Eagles at Cowboys

Photo: Nicole Cordero

The Eagles are 4-9-1. The Cowboys are 5-9. Either one of them could finish in last place. Either one of them could host a playoff game.

THE NFC EAST, BABY!

No matter the stakes, the Eagles’ annual trip to Dallas always means a little more to Eagles fans than it probably should. But this season, with a win and a little help from the Ravens and Panthers, the Birds could find themselves a win away from a division title with a victory over the Cowboys.

How will the game play out? It’s a ridiculous pursuit to try and figure that out, so of course the guys will try. John goes first.

John (4-6-4): Two lukewarm teams in contention for a putrid division…just as the NFL schedulers intended. The Dallas Cowboys are enjoying a two-game win streak. The Philadelphia Eagles are riding a moral victory. 

Neither squad, however, is likely to make the playoffs. At best, the late life both teams showed in the previous two weeks is downgrading their prime draft slots. An Eagles win on Sunday adds a little more heat to Philly’s red-hot QB controversy, a certainty after Jalen Hurts shreds the Cowboys’ inept defense. 

Look for Hurts to improve on his performance in Arizona in a Texas shootout. The Eagles defense may be banged up, but Jim Schwartz will once again find a way to keep his team in the game. Eagles win and keep this sad funhouse open one more week. Eagles 30, Cowboys 24.

Offensive Standout: Dallas Goedert

Defensive Standout: Alex Singleton

Joe (6-4-4): When a fairly easily-resisted force meets one of the most moveable objects in human history, nothing has to give, but I feel like something will, and it will be the comedy gods giving us another week of the “lol how is this happening” sort of head shaking we’ve been doing since October.

Jalen Hurts has played well. He has not set the world on fire, but to listen to people in Philadelphia, “Hurts” is Latin for “Montana and Young,” and “Jalen” is Latin for “the second coming of.” As I’ve said on the podcast, there are a lot of reasons why the quarterback switch has worked well over the past few weeks, and Hurts himself is only one of them.

A big one: running the football! The Cowboys are more like matadors, allowing a league-worst 162 yards per game on the ground. I don’t know, but I feel like that’s a lot. If I can bestow a presidential-style nickname, even Stubborn Doug Pederson can’t ignore that. He’ll hand the ball off more than he’s normally inclined to, and Hurts’ competence will look like pending superstardom once again.

This season needs to end, so of course it won’t. The Eagles will win on Sunday and extend the misery for at least one more week. BONUS PREDICTION: Another fumble or two for Jalen Hurts. BONUS BONUS PREDICTION: Panthers 24, Football Team 14. Eagles 22, Cowboys 14.

Offensive Standout: Miles Sanders

Defensive Standout: Fletcher Cox

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s